Yesterday I wrote about watching Declan build little dams in a mountain stream while we were camping beside Lac de Serre-Ponçon in the French Alps. I thought I’d taken everything I could from that simple moment.
Then something else happened.
Declan disappeared for a few minutes. When he came back, he wasn’t alone. He’d gone to find his little sister, Shiloh.
He didn’t need her help to build the dams. He wasn’t struggling to move the stones. He simply wanted her to experience it too. We were enjoying ourselves so much that he wanted her to be part of it.
That struck me because nobody had suggested it. There was no prompting from me. His instinct was simply to share the experience.
As I watched the two of them working together, another leadership lesson quietly unfolded before me.
Leadership isn’t meant to be a solo journey. The strongest leaders don’t try to carry every responsibility themselves, nor do they guard every opportunity or protect every success as though it belongs to them alone.
Instead, they invite others into the stream. They share the experience, ask for another perspective, and make room for someone else’s ideas because they understand that the best outcomes are often created together.
As I watched Declan and Shiloh, I noticed something else. The dams became better. One would spot a stone the other hadn’t noticed. One would point to a new place for the water to flow. Occasionally one of them would accidentally knock something over, only for them both to laugh and build something even better.
Neither child was leading the other. They were simply discovering together.
It reminded me how often we convince ourselves that leadership means having all the answers. We put pressure on ourselves to be the smartest person in the room, the one with the vision, the solution, and the plan.
But leadership isn’t about having all the answers. As I’ve said in other articles, it’s about recognising the gifts and skills of those with whom you have surrounded yourself.
Sometimes leadership is having the humility to invite someone else into the journey before you know the answer yourself. It’s trusting other people enough to contribute. It’s recognising that different experiences, different gifts, and different perspectives don’t weaken leadership—they strengthen it.
I’ve seen this throughout my career. Some of the best ideas I’ve ever been part of weren’t mine. They emerged because someone was willing to listen, to ask another question, or to invite one more person into the conversation.
Too many leaders carry unnecessary weight because they believe asking for help somehow diminishes their leadership. In reality, it often does the opposite. People become more committed to a vision when they’ve had the opportunity to help shape it.
That’s true in families. It’s true in businesses. It’s true in churches. It’s true in communities.
As we eventually climbed back onto our bikes, I realised something else.
The stream hadn’t changed because of one child. It had changed because one child thought to invite another into the experience.
Perhaps that’s one of the simplest questions every leader can ask themselves today.
Who am I inviting into the stream?
